Forging through Fear – WOMEN in RECOVERY

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circle-comfort-Zone-copy1_thumb4Forging is a manufacturing process involving the shaping of metal using localized compressive forces.

Forging is often classified according to the temperature at which it is performed: “cold”, “warm”, or “hot” forging.

Forged parts can range in weight from less than a kilogram to 580 metric tons.

Forged parts usually require further processing to achieve a finished part.
 

There are many kinds of forging processes; all that can be grouped into three main classes:

  1. Drawn out: length increases, cross-section decreases
  2. Upset: length decreases, cross-section increases
  3. Squeezed: in closed compression dies: produces multidirectional flow

 
Zazen2“Weakening the physical senses by practicing austerities is one way to allow the spiritual senses to become stronger.

Activities like Zazen, fasting, ascetic practices in the mountains, and so on exhaust the body and allow the spiritual senses to become more active.”

The bottom line here involves one getting completely outside the ‘comfort zone’ your life has developed around you. If you are ready to draw out your true self, shake up the world you are living in, and squeeze yourself so hard that your mind, body and soul burst?
 
…. then you are ready to live a life of your dreams!
 

Get ready to walk through these four steps to ‘forging’ a new way of life.
 
1]  VISUALIZE: Take Inventory of Your Current Reality

One purpose of taking a personal inventory of the major areas in your life is to acknowledge what’s working and balanced and to pinpoint what’s out of balance and not working. In this context, the aspects of life that are balanced are areas to be grateful for and express appreciation towards. The imbalances represent opportunities for change.

When people are troubled or feeling badly, it is often difficult to identify what is in balance in their lives and give credit to the things that are going well. Focus on the obvious and basic stuff of life in this situation. If you are able to get out of bed each day and go about your activities, then take note of that fact. If you have the freedom to buy all the food you need to feed your family every week, be grateful for your abundance.
 
2]  CLASSIFY: Evaluate Experiences, noting which environments makes you feel peaceful; and those that make you feel anxiety

It’s relatively easy to notice what is out of balance in your life. Your attention is probably frequently drawn to what is lacking, uncomfortable, going wrong or the opposite of what you want. Sometimes we can get very good at covering up the imbalances and suffering instead of facing them and taking action to resolve them. Usually, there’s some sort of “dissing” involved such as discomfort, discord, distress, disharmony, disagreement, disillusion or even disease.

Identifying the key areas in your life is a good place to start the process of taking your personal inventory and being honest about what is out of balance. There is no one size fits all kind of list, but the following categories cover the major areas. Add or delete what applies to you. In some instances, sub-categories are added to give you more to think about.

However these could be listed as individual categories.

  • Spirituality
  • Health – Physical, Emotional, Mental
  • Personal Growth
  • Relationships – Spouse, Significant Other, Family, Friends, Co-workers, Pets
  • Community
  • Finances
  • Career
  • Relaxation & Fun

 
3]  IDENTIFY: Set your own boundaries, drawing lines of behavior tolerances being willing to learn to say ‘NO’

Once you have identified the major areas of your life, get a pad of paper and head up each sheet with only one category. Draw a line down the center of the paper and put a plus sign (+) at the top of the left column and a minus sign (-) at the top of the right column. Or, if you want an online template for this exercise, click here Balance Exercise and use the form provided to type out your information.

The “T” square format works nicely to organize what is out of balance and lacking in your life and to compare it to what is balanced and working for you. Since it is sometimes easier to focus on the imbalances, you might want to get those out of the way and start with the minus column. There is no right or wrong way to do this exercise. The idea is to engage your conscious awareness and spend the time thinking about the quality of your life.

For example, using the Relationship category, a personal inventory might look like this, assisting you to set the boundaries now missing in your life:
 
chart

4] FURTHER PROCESS: Take Action to become the Woman You want to Be

Bringing the imbalances out of hiding or denial, and into conscious awareness is enlightening. Consciously acknowledging and being grateful for the good things in life is a productive habit to engage in because it attracts more of the same and feels good.

The entire process assists the conscious mind to get involved, which is important because the conscious mind is the ‘gatekeeper to change‘, and enables you to set your personal ‘intentions‘ for your life, in place.

Keep your intentions evolving and notice when they don’t motivate you anymore. As you use this tool, you’ll find you may achieve the desired outcome, but you might not feel the way you want to — there’s a missing element.

You’ll always need to modify, deepen or change intentions entirely as you grow. Say you achieved your money goal but you’re exhausted. Your next intention may be that your work will seem like play. And when you add concepts such as “happy surprises,” you leave room for something good to happen outside the realm of what you can conceive.

© Deborah A. Lindholm

freshstartTake Action!

‘Forge’ yourself into the destined Brilliant Human Being, you were born to be, letting go all the matrix collected so far.

Make today the first day of the rest of your personal Journey of LIFE. The time is now to drop all those things that were never meant to be in/with you, let go of all the stuff slowing you down, or emotionally leave anything that makes you feeling hopeless?
 
 

RELATED GOOD READS ONLINE:
 
Spiritual Fitness, Lynn A. Anderson PhD.

Spiritual Fitness

SPIRITUAL FITNESS in Ten Minute a Day, Margaret Fourie and Arthur G. Clarke

Spiritual Fitness
David J. Hufford , PhD * ; Matthew J. Fritts , MPH † ; Jeffrey E. Rhodes , DMin ‡

ABSTRACT – Addressed to Thought Leaders et al

Spirituality, as distinct from psychological and other variables, is now recognized as a crucial element in the total force fitness of service members. There is substantial literature available for the development of evidence-based policies and programs for spiritual support and the treatment of spiritual distress and moral injury. These developments should be integrated within existing programs, and this will require that commanders be proactive. Chaplains provide a primary resource and should be enabled to operate within integrated teams of support personnel.

This has not been the case historically, and only the leadership of commanders can bring this about.

Programs should utilize existing instruments for monitoring purposes, but should also include proactive plans for service members before deployment and whenever events such as large-scale civilian casualties increase the overall risk of spiritual distress. Behavioral science experts should be utilized in a collaborative role with chaplains in developing spiritual support. Leaders should receive elementary training in cultural competence and spiritual diversity to provide the needed support for spiritual fitness program development.

 

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Comments

  1. Fascinating blog! Is your theme custom made or did you download it from somewhere?

    A design like yours with a few simple tweeks would really make my blog stand out.
    Please let me know where you got your theme. With thanks

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