HOPE is where the HEART is,

and One should Never Lose HEART!

Burdened….?span>

The word alone makes shoulders sink. It slows down our lives. It clouds our vision. It is the result of so many memories, grudges, fears, uncertainty, and stress. It is heavy.

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” (Matt 11:28)

Overworked?

Overcommitted?

Overtired?

Underappreciated?

Let go and live free.

Sound impossible?

Sheila Walsh thought so until God proved himself again and again through his Word, his people, and her life.

You can lay down your burdens. You can rest. You can find peace. You can live free.

Start here….

” Let Go and see what God can do.”

Hope is the belief in a positive outcome related to events and circumstances in one’s life.

Hope is distinct from positive thinking, which refers to a therapeutic or systematic process used in psychology for reversing pessimism. In other words hope is a feeling of optimistic feelings in a negitive or falling situation to overcome it in success. The term false hope refers to a hope based entirely around a fantasy or an extremely unlikely outcome.

Beginnings are scary. Endings are usually sad, but it’s what’s in the middle that counts. So, when you find yourself at the beginning, just give hope a chance to float up. With Hope, the angels always win as long as there is love. And it will!

Marcus Tullius Cicero
The higher we are placed, the more humbly we should walk.

Marcus Tullius Cicero
Man can’t help hoping even if he is a scientist. He can only hope more accurately.

My name is Candan and I am a recovering alcoholic, I was born in 1942 in İstanbul, Turkey. I don’t remember my father because he died when I was one year old. I grew up with a step father. I didn’t have a very happy childhood although my mother was a wonderful women. I went to the American college in İstanbul and I was a boarder all my school life. I loved to be away from home.

I started drinking after I got married. I was 18 years old when I got married. My husband was a heavy drinker ( he still is ) and we went out with friends almost every single night. I didn’t like the taste of alcohol. I was a very shy young women. I blushed very easily which made me blush more because I hated that. The first thing I realized after I drank a glass of alcohol was that I was more relaxed and didn’t blush any more. The taste did not matter anymore, I loved the effect for the many other things in my daily life.

I drank for 22 more years. I have two children. Each time I became pregnant I would stop drinking for the requisite nine months. That convinced me and the people around me that I was just a social drinker. As years went by the glasses turned out to be bottles. Instead of drinking with everybody I started hiding the bottles. The drinking hours came earlier each day until it came to drinking all day and night until I passed out. I still had no idea of what was happening to me. I believed that I was a bad person who had no will power. I did not deserve my family, anyway I did not deserve to live. I had a lot of pain, guilt and remorse and the only time I thought I felt normal and without those hurting feelings was when I drank. I could not live, I could not die. I was ashamed of my children, friends, husband and my family. Still I just could not stop. When I look back now I can also see the insanity. One example is that I thought that my liver was a sponge, and I craved for alcohol when it got dry, I felt OK!!! when I wet it.

At the time we had moved to Brussels for my husband’s business. He took me to many doctors, psychologists and psychiatrists. I even went to the Houston Medical Center in US, three times. They said that Alpha was missing in my brain and I had to be treated. They gave me all kind of medicines including Valium, but never told me to stop drinking. Although I was lying to them about the amount. When I look back now the amount I told them was enough to make them realize my disease. Today this is not important for me because I know that I had to live whatever life I needed to hit my bottom and I did.

In Brussels I heard some things about AA but I never bothered to investigate, because I wanted nothing to do with alcoholics. I could be crazy but never an alcoholic. One morning I had just drank some to be normal, the doorbell rang and I had two beautiful American ladies looking for me at the door. They came in, we sat at the living room. With an instinct. I did not resist their coming in. When they started speaking to me I could not believe my ears. They were talking about the things I was doing and the feelings I had. Their story was my story. For the first time in my life I had found people who could understand me and I decided to try AA meetings. This was the best decision of my life although I did not know it then. I always believed in God but I did not know that day that I was living one of His miracles.

I loved AA meetings and the people. The beginning was very hard because again I had no idea of the Rehabs. So I was trying to detox myself and my friends took me to the meeting every single night. I still couldn’t drive and very afraid to go out alone. They helped me in every way. Janet and Leslie became my sponsors. I learned a lot from them. I am very grateful to my Higher Power, for putting them and you people in my life.

I started translating the Big Book to Turkish. I had no idea why. Maybe I thought someday it could help the alcoholics in Turkey. There was no AA in Turkey and no rehabs. Just one mental hospital where also the drunks and all kind of addicts were treated. Each time I visited my country I went to that hospital and just tried to share with them. Without AA it did not work but it was still something.

When I had four years of sobriety we had a bankruptcy. We moved back to Turkey. It was very hard for me to leave my friends but, I knew that God was with me. In İstanbul I went to the American Hospital and talked with the director, Dr. Winkler. He is a great friend of AA. He gave me the small library to start the meetings and promised to help me in every way. I started going to the hospital every Tuesday at 6.00 o’clock and waited for somebody to come for three months. I had all my literature with me and the tapes that my AA friends sent me. I was opening and closing the meeting with the Serenity Prayer all by myself but never lost my hope.

I was right, GOD was there with me. I carried the message and He helped me with it. Today AA is all around Turkey. There are a lot of recovering alcoholics. We recently started Young People’s AA. My Turkish Translation with all the other AA literature was published by GSO in New York.

I have been to three world conventions. At one of them I carried the flag for Turkey. Miracles, miracles, miracles…..Six years ago I was diagnosed with cancer and today after six operations I have no more cancer cells in my body. “GOD WORKS İN MYSTERİOUS WAYS”

I also studied for seven summers at the Rutgers University to become an addiction counselor. I have been working at the American Hospital in Turkey as a counselor for a number of years now.

I wrote a book about my disease and my recovery. The book helped a lot of Alcoholics. Then it was translated to English by an American friend of mine who knew very good Turkish. — “A Sober Journey to God”— I have not publish it yet because I do not know how to do it in US.

Twelve years ago no one in Turkey believed that alcohol addiction is a disease. The doctors did not even want to help the addicts. We were seen as bad, senseless creatures, without feelings, and no willpower. Slowly, step by step, using the media, the doctors and people, and without breaking the Traditions of AA, I spread the word telling whatever I learned about my disease at Rutgers and in AA. I never gave up.

Today most of the Hospitals have a clinic for alcoholics and drug addicts. Doctors know about AA and the program. People started believing that it is a disease and started to go to treatment and AA with an open mind. We are still very new here but we are growing and young people are educated about addiction at schools. We are happy and full of hope for the coming years. But as alcoholics we are grateful for this 24 hour and the change in Turkey.

A big HUG from Turkish AA to all of you around the world. We love you very much. Anonymous.

Bill Cosby
Love comes to those who still hope even though they’ve been disappointed, to those who still believe even though they’ve been betrayed, to those who still love even though they’ve been hurt before.

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