Sex Coach Kim Anami on the Orgasms That Change Your Life

On a recent episode of the “Love, Sex, Magic” podcast, sex and relationship coach Kim Anami got real about topics that don’t get talked about in sexual education classes — but should. Anami has been developing her ideologies about sexual wellness over the past few decades by studying Tantric and Taoist philosophy and coaching people through physical and emotional blocks that keep them from enjoying sex.

Anami takes an unorthodox approach to teaching people about sex, often using humor and creativity to talk about taboo subjects. She even started an internet campaign that showcases her lifting different objects around the world with her vagina to highlight concerns women face, like pelvic prolapse and urinary incontinence. These issues are often dealt with through surgery, but Anami says it’s misguided to approach everything as a medical problem. In bringing awareness to other solutions to these issues, Anami hopes to destigmatize and demystify them. “These are things that can all be addressed holistically,” she says.

Anami believes the taboo society has created around sex and sexual health obscures some of the most obvious solutions to the problems everyone faces. She says one of the most powerful tools for many physical and emotional problems is one we all have at our disposal: orgasm. She even recommends solo sex dates as needed for women to work through some of their emotional blocks. “Emotional stuff that’s stored in the vaginal tissues gets released through stimulation and having these orgasms. So that’s why I say they’re great therapy,” she shares. “Your sexual organs are the great barometer for whatever’s going on.”

She encourages people to work on having healthy and powerful orgasms by themselves and with their partners. Both kinds of release can be equally empowering if done with patience and intention. She encourages individuals in a couple to tap into their masculine and feminine energy to better please their partner and themself. This often requires men to practice patience and restraint with their orgasms and women to practice letting go. “The woman has to be in a

certain place of openness and surrender and trust and letting go. And if she’s not able to get there, her vagina will not have that experience either,” Anami says.

Kim Anami talks about how orgasms can help people move through emotional and physical blockages. “[If] a woman has a history of sexual abuse or a bunch of bad relationships, or is internalizing beliefs in the culture at large, all of those things are written on the body,” Anami says. “If people can learn how to open themselves up to their sexual [side], they can use orgasms to address some of the emotions they’ve been hiding from. Used sparingly, anal orgasms can be especially helpful in helping people practice openness and acceptance. It’s a beautiful tool for that.”

In her “Orgasmic Enlightenment” podcast, Anami talks about ideas and tools to help people have powerful orgasmic experiences that move them forward in life. “Most people are operating with a deficiency of information,” she says. Through sharing her ideas on her podcast and other platforms, Anami hopes to help people peel away the defense mechanisms they’ve adopted around sex. Her online salons, including How To Be a Well-F–ked Woman and Sexual Mastery for Men, help people further incorporate these ideas into their lives.