Part of growing up and maturing in your marriage is coming to terms with the fact that it comes down to what both of you and your partner make out of it. The only way you can make it work is to continue showing up day in and day out no matter how hard it gets. Although marriage is a huge part of your life, it is still considered to be an add-on, so, unless it brings you moments of happiness and contentment, it makes no sense to allow it to take over your existence. However, what many couples forget, or choose to ignore along the way, is that it takes a lot of work to make a happy married life.
Do not for a second believe that it is a matter of luck or that some people are fortunate enough to be blessed with a happy marriage while others are not because this is not completely true. Yes, the stars need to align to ignite that spark that you experience early on when the relationship is budding, however, to keep this spark alive, it takes a lot of consistent hard work and unwavering commitment. Even though each marriage is unique and has its distinctive dynamics, there are some commonalities that most couples would agree on.
In this article, we will shed the light on 4 of the key factors for a happy married life that you need to keep in the back of your mind going forward.
1. Showing That You Care
Marriage is supposed to be a sacred space where you can truly be yourself and feel safe enough to let your guard down. Even if you do not consider yourself to be an expressive person and prefer to keep your emotions to yourself, when there is another person involved, you have to let your feelings show. Showing your love and care to your partner will make them feel safe in the relationship so that they can be themselves in turn without any fear of judgment. This raw emotional nakedness will allow you and your partner to share an intimate bond that will make you feel connected in ways that no one else can understand. Showing care comes in many shapes and forms, however, you have to learn about your partner’s needs when it comes to caring. Maybe it is helping them out around the house, or perhaps they prefer pampering and like to go out on date nights. Whatever way you choose to show your care, make sure that it communicates your intentions in a language that your spouse will understand and appreciate.
2. Maintaining Harmony
Happily married couples have an all-encompassing harmony. Emotional, mental, and physical harmony is what keeps the wheels of any happy marriage rolling. Harmony does not happen overnight; it takes communication and lots of practice before you can feel in tune with your partner in every sense of the word. When your husband looks for ways to boost sexual stamina, it is his way of seeking physical harmony with you. Sex is an integral part of married life, especially that over time, it can get pretty mundane unless you remain mindful about protecting physical harmony with your partner. When it comes to mental harmony, you can easily notice it with your married friends who always seem to finish each other’s sentences, true it is absolutely a cringe-worthy thing to witness, yet, it does imply a level of intimacy in their relationship that is crucial for having a happy married life. Being on the same wavelength as your partner will take the pressure off of the hardest conversations and increase the level of trust between the two of you making way for a happier married life.
3. Take Turns to Sustain Your Marriage
Yes, it takes two to make the marriage work, however, since we are all continually evolving and growing, you cannot expect your partner to grow at the same pace or in the same ways that you do. There will come times where you will feel depleted and need your own space to feel the feelings that you need to feel before you can continue showing up for your marriage and the same goes for your spouse. A key factor for having a happy married life is learning how to take turns when one of you is feeling down and needs to take a breather, the other person should step up and assume responsibility without having any feelings of resentment or betrayal. When this occasional exchange of roles is done from a place of love and validation for each other’s personal journeys it can unlock the door to a happy marriage that you never even knew existed until now.
4. Accepting the Turmoil
If a happy married life is what you are seeking, you and your partner have to accept and even sometimes embrace the inevitable turmoil that you will face along the way. No marriage is free of troubles, it just doesn’t exist, so stop wasting your time and effort trying to reach a mirage that only exists in your imagination. The sooner you and your partner become realistic about your marriage and what it can and cannot give the both of you, the easier it will be to redirect your energy on building a happy life together. The fights, the tears, the screaming, and even the door-slamming are all part of any relationship between any two people who share a life. You would be belittling your relationship if you choose to see these incidents as signs of a failed and a miserable marriage. The truth is, these nuisances are lessons in disguise where you have the chance to learn more about each other so that you can deepen your connection further and understand how you can live happily together. The fleeting superficial happiness that you experience with your partner when everything is going great and life is happening for the both of you cannot even compare to the kind of joy and contentment that will materialize after overcoming turbulent seasons in your marriage together.
4 Key Factors for a Happy Married Life
July 3, 2020 by