A Celebration of Women

is honored to Celebrate the Life of this powerhouse of spirit, a woman that has recognized her own condition, risen above the challenge and Taken Action to live the life that she was destined to live. Upon the acceptance of her path, she moved forward and now devotes her life to helping others remove the stigma of mental illness, heal and thrive!

“I agree that it is so important to highlight successful women (and men) who are making great strides within their community. I do what I do because I do not want anyone to have to suffer depression alone – the way I did. We live in the 21st century – it is time to bring depression into the light and start seeing it for the illness that it really is.”

 

WOMAN of ACTION

Terri Karch

 

 

My story – wow! Trying to put my life with depression onto one page will be hard so I will give you the basics and then share more with you through my blog.

My name is Terri Karch and like you or someone in your family, I suffer from depression. Once I came to terms with my own depression, I knew I wanted to share with others my personal story and triumph over the disease. And the only way I know to share my story is to be completely honest and uncomplicated when it comes to this disease.

I was raised in a household where perfection was not only the norm but it was expected. My father ruled with an iron tongue and although I knew he loved me, there was no verbal communication – no “I love you’s” – no hugs. He expected us to be perfect in all that we did and never make mistakes and when we did – we were reprimanded greatly.

My mother stayed home with us and cared for us but was always very distant emotionally. She lacked the compassion we needed growing up and basically went through the motions of motherhood thinking providing our “physical” needs would somehow due the trick.

I am not blaming my parents for my depression – they did the best they could and I love them both. I became very close to my father prior to his death in 2004 and I miss him dearly. I only tell you this so you can understand that depression is a ‘biological disorder’ that can also be triggered by social environment.

I truly believe had it not been for finding Jesus Christ at the age of 13, I would not be here today. God is who sustained me through the events of my childhood and gave me the strength to continue. He is my driving force today.

My daddy raised me to be a “strong independent woman” – he had no sons so I guess I was the next best thing. I spent my life desperately trying to please him without ever a nod or ‘job well done”. My depression began at an early age, I think, because of the social environment and the fact that many on my mom’s side also suffered from this disease.

I was married at age 19 to my best friend and saving grace! To the outside world, I appeared this happy, confident, in control woman – but inside I was dying. My clothes closet became my best friend. I would spend hours at a time in my closet huddled on the floor in the dark crying for no reason at all. I felt no one loved me and I didn’t see any reason to go on. The reality was – I had a wonderful husband who adored me and we had a great life but my brain told me otherwise.

You see, when you have depression – you don’t always see things clearly. I became very insecure and made up for that insecurity by putting other people down to make myself feel better. I had no sense of self-worth because I was going crazy and couldn’t understand why. I became a mean and bitter person and spent my days withdrawn into my own little shell so no one could touch me or hurt me. There were days when getting out of bed became the biggest goal on my list.

My father was diagnosed with diabetes around 1998 and passed away in December of 2004 (we will save that story for another day). He was only 60 years old when he passed away and I suddenly felt very alone. My dad – in my adult life – had become my friend and confidant and I didn’t know what I was going to do without him.

It was after his death three years later that I finally came to terms with my depression. I was having a horrible evening and felt like my entire world was falling apart. It is sometimes a hard feeling to describe – almost like I wanted to shake my brain awake because it wasn’t functioning properly.

I felt like I was in a dark tunnel and I could see the light but I just couldn’t get there.

I drove to my fathers grave and texted my children and told them good bye and I loved them. I layed on my father’s grave and begged God to let me die. I couldn’t live with the darkness any longer. But, God in His infinite wisdom gave me a song when I returned to the car for a kleenex.

On the radio was playing “I Can Only Imagine” – the same song that played the day my Dad died. I knew it was time to get up, get on my feet and get help.

“I have a lot of pride – I am my father’s daughter – so asking for help was the hardest thing I could do but I did it for my children and my husband and for me”.

I finally went to my doctor and told her that I thought I was losing my mind.   She prescribed Prozac and gave me information on other ways to deal with the depression.

I could not believe the difference in my focus and abilities once I took the medication. Suddenly, I was calmer and I could focus on tasks and not cry every five minutes! But the biggest “medicine” for me was actually coming to terms with it and speaking the name “Depression”.

I felt the same way many do when they hear the word “depression” – get over it and get on with your life. I knew the stigma’s attached to mental illness and as a Business Woman, I didn’t want to receive “those looks” from people who didn’t understand the disease. But as I started talking to other women who shared the same illness but were afraid to seek help, I realized this was the calling God had placed on my life. It was my purpose in life to share my story and tell others about Depression.

Sharing my story was great therapy for me in the beginning and still is today. I stayed on the medication for almost a year and began exercising every day as well. Exercise is a big key to individuals with depression because it releases natural endorphins that help to counteract the chemical imbalance. I can actually tell a difference on the days that I am not able to exercise – I become very moody and “cloudy” in my thinking.

Do you know one of the best therapies, in my opinion? Volunteering! That’s right! When you feel at your lowest, get yourself out and volunteer somewhere and help others. It does wonders for your mind. I volunteer at our local soup kitchen and serving others helps me to put my own thoughts and life into perspective. Although I will admit there was one occassion where I was feeling very low and depressed and I cancelled my day to volunteer. Can I tell you how much worse I felt after I did that? I vowed to myself never to cancel again because it is what I needed the most.

I now only take the Prozac a few times a month to keep my brain properly balanced as per my doctors orders. My body is extremely sensitive to medicine so a few times a month is all I need. You may need to take medicine daily – just like any illness. I also exercise every day – usually 45 minutes on the treadmill in the morning. And I talk to people about my disease. I no longer hide from the illness that has plagued me since childhood.

Do I have bad days? Of course. But I have learned enough about my disease to understand how to deal with those days and how to make it through. For me, my faith in God is my biggest sustainer. During my recovery, I prayed daily for help and healing and He gave me the strength to go on even when I didn’t think I could take another step.

I own a successful real estate investment/building company and have two beautiful children and a husband who adores me. I volunteer at my church and also direct a non-profit charity that provides assistance to those in need. I am able to do the things I want to do and achieve success through it all.

I am opening my life to you for one reason only – so you will not feel alone. I have been there. I have been through those dark moments when you feel like you can no longer breathe another breath. I had those days (and weeks and years) when I felt like I had nothing left to offer this world and nothing left to give.

But then I discovered what I had was a treatable illness and it was nothing to be ashamed of. There is no shame in depression – it is a biological illness. Just like other organs, your brain is sick. But there is hope and treatment available.

I will continue to share more of my story through the blog. It is hard to cover everything in my 43 years on just a few pages. Please follow my story and feel free to contact me for help or support.

Together we can do this!

God Bless You!

“Let Go. Let God”

What Is Mrs. International?

VOTE FOR TERRI HERE

A FAMILY AFFAIR…The International Pageant system has been developed to promote today’s married women, their accomplishments, and commitment to family and marriage. Around the world women are finding this system to be the opportunity to work with their husband and family to become positive role models. Being the premiere pageant for married women has given Mrs. International® a chance to open doors for married women around the world.The Mrs. International® 2012 competition will be held July 20th and 21st, 2012, at the Northshore Center for the Performing Arts in Chicago, Illinois. The exciting events and activities leading up to the Pageant begin in Chicago on July 17th. The event will give each contestant the opportunity to learn about customs and family life in other countries, along with the chance to share her beliefs and make new friends during the entire week of activities leading up to two exciting evenings of competition.Our Mission: “To Make a Difference”

Beginning 23 years ago, Mrs. International® was developed to have higher standards than other pageant systems. The focus behind Mrs. International® is to showcase women 21 to 56 years old, married at least six months and a resident of the state or a citizen of the country she represents. Each contestant competes in Interview Competition, which is valued for 50% of her overall score, Evening Gown, valued for 25% and Fitness Wear for 25%. Each contestant has the opportunity to select a platform of her choice that she spends the year promoting. Husbands are a direct part of the show, escorting their wives in the Evening Gown competition, and the husband crowns his wife titleholder.

Terri in 2012 – CONTESTANT

Bringing A Positive Light to Depression

I created this website first and foremost as a forum to help others dealing with depression. But I also created it to help Change the Face people see when they think of Depression. I no longer want the face people see when they think of depression to be a face of hopelessness – I want it to be a face of hope.

If you have depression, please understand that you are not alone. I know it may feel sometimes like you are alone or that you are the only one who is suffering, but please know that there are others with this disease and we want to help.

FIRST – let me clarify – I am not a doctor nor a medical professional. I am simply a woman living with depression who wants to give you the personal side of living with this disease. The information I provide on this website is simply a guide to help you find the assistance you need. Find a doctor you trust and get the initial diagnosis and treatment you need.

I will give you the facts on the disease and dispel the myths involved with depression. But I also promise to give you the honest truth about my own life living with depression and how I finally came to terms with this disease.

Because right now you need the facts about depression but you also need to know that someone shares your story and understands what you are going through.

I will share my life with you through my blog but I want this website to be a source of hope – not a place of hopelessness. Yes, I have depression – it is part of me but I refuse to allow it to define who I am.

I have achieved success in my life in spite of this disease and am able to stand before you today a woman in full recovery ready to open my life to you and share my story.

* Everything on this website is simply my opinion.

Terri’s message to the Women of our World: “PLEASE SEE YOUR DOCTOR FOR THE MEDICAL TREATMENT THAT BEST FITS YOU. Treatments are different for each person and only you and your doctor can decide what is right for you”.

A Celebration of Women

welcomes this pioneer into our Alumni with open arms.

Brava Terri!