Here is Your Prescription…, Larry James

On the hit TV show, "Elementary," Sherlock, after lots of banter back and forth with his shrink, his psychiatrist abruptly said, "Hour's up!" and handed him a prescription. It read, "Make one new friend before next week." Friendship is a good thing, however, somehow we all forget how important it is. A friend is someone you know well and care about, who also knows and cares about you. We need more people like this in our lives. Great friendships improve all aspects of our lives. When you … [Read more...]

When YOU Stop Paying Attention, Larry James

When You Stop Paying Attention to Your Marriage… It begins to fall apart. Slowly at first. Then the consistent lack of attention begins to gain momentum until the divorce papers are served and you're shocked! You ponder, "I should have known." And you would have known but you were not paying attention! A plant that is not watered eventually loses its spark. Many relationships need to be watered too. They become stale and stagnant. Both partners are stuck but cannot see that their lack … [Read more...]

LOVE like an Albatross, Larry James

The word 'albatross' is sometimes used metaphorically to mean a psychological burden that feels like a curse. It is an allusion to Samuel Taylor Coleridge's poem, "The Rime of the Ancient Mariner" (1798). In the poem, an albatross starts to follow a ship - being followed by an albatross was generally considered an omen of good luck. However, the titular mariner shoots the albatross with a crossbow, which is regarded as an act that will curse the ship (which indeed suffers terrible … [Read more...]

Shadows of the Past, Larry James

Shadows of the past are our out-dated precepts and ideas that serve no one. They are our preconceived notions about how we think things should be, should turn out or how things are. They cast their dreary shadow between ourselves and all that is good. We must steadily move closer to the realization that our outer-circumstances are not something to be resolved but rather look upon them as inner-conditions to be acknowledged and understood. We can never see the fullness of the Light while … [Read more...]

The Best Gift for Your Holiday Honey

Are you wondering, what is the best gift for your honey this holiday season? Relationships and marriages become stressed around the holidays. Too much to do and not enough time. What tends to fall to the bottom of our lists is making time to connect with our partners. It doesn’t have to be this way. With just a little thoughtfulness, your relationship can flourish during the holidays. Several years ago Bob and I wrote about what we call “Holi-Dates.” Holi-Date – A short, sweet date with … [Read more...]

Is it Time to Push the “Reset” Button?‏, Larry James

Is it Time to Push the “Reset” Button? by Larry James If your relationship is not gaining ground... you could begin again (with the same partner)! Be warned: Once a choice is made to end the relationship no amount of coaching, no communication techniques will make the relationship work unless - you and your partner make the decision that you want to have a relationship with your partner and decide how you want to make it work. If you can make that decision then you have taken the first … [Read more...]

How to Decorate a Christmas Tree‏

How to Decorate a Christmas Tree by Larry James Direct Export Company, Guest Author A Christmas tree should reflect the personality of the family and coordinate with the room in which it is placed. The variety of decorating styles is as varied as the number of people decorating the tree. Whether starting with a cut tree or everlasting tree, here are some basic rules that will help the decorator achieve the desired look. The folks at Direct Export Company have provided us with some … [Read more...]

How to Argue With Your Partner‏, Laurie Puhn, Guest Author

You can argue and still have a happy marriage - if your arguments lead to solutions rather than lingering bitterness. Four ways to encourage this... Alter argument patterns ~ Many couples have fallen into argument patterns that lead to more anger instead of a peaceful resolution. Maybe she criticizes, he gets defensive, she dredge up an old disagreement, he insults her, than she storms off - again and again. Making even a minor change near the outset of an argument could prevent this … [Read more...]

Do You have what it takes to be Generous?

"The tsunami of generosity is too strong to say no. Most of us are never taught how to receive. Only how to give. And when we encounter people who refuse to let us leave empty handed, we don't know what to say. The correct answer is, "Yes, thank you, I would love three pounds of stuffed mushrooms to take home with me." It doesn't matter if you're hungry. Or even if you like mushrooms. You have to allow yourself to be the recipient of their generosity. Just let the wave wash over you. Don't rob … [Read more...]

Confrontation is Not a 4-Letter Word‏, Larry James

For a healthy relationship to survive, confrontation is often necessary. However, it is one of those words that seem to evoke negative emotions and responses. Many couples do their best to avoid any confrontation. What you don't say if often the very thing that can drive a wedge between couples that can be difficult to move past. We often perceive confrontation as conflict. It is not. Conflict and confrontation are not really synonyms, but we do behave and speak as if they are. Some people … [Read more...]

Guys! Know When to Zip Your Lip!‏

"Does this dress make my butt look big?" Woah, Dude! Shut my mouth! Is this a trick question? How do you answer a question like that? You are about to enter a minefield. If you do answer, do so at your own risk. What if she actually has a big butt? Not a lot of wiggle room there. Women should know better than to ask the question that way (grow up and quit asking questions that require your man to lie). In a survey I read recently, women resoundingly responded that the perfect answer is "No, … [Read more...]

Don’t Need More Information ~ Need More Romantic Action‏

Remember when you first got together. Go waaay back... back when you were both were not afraid to be romantic and show your feelings. Remember when? The longer we are together, it seems that we begin to suffer from paralysis by analysis. It’s a condition that holds many of us back. Way back. We wish it were like it used to be but we are afraid to take the first step to genuinely show our affection to our partner. We analyze the situation and become paralyzed or reluctant to make the first … [Read more...]

Why Do People Get Married?‏

Everyone knows that there are ups and downs to putting a ring on it! Yet, thousands of couples get married every year. Love seems to be the main reason. What's Love got to do with it? A lot. AND Love is never enough! Love usually tops the list with most people. Companionship is a close second. Marriage usually involves tradition, religion, family and/or culture. Signing papers conveys respectability. You don't need a marriage certificate or label to be happy. It's a public declaration of love … [Read more...]

Expectancy vs. Expectations‏, Larry James

Recently I heard the someone say, "Everyone is doing the best they can," and it caused me to stop and think about what that means. Sometimes we tend to view other people with a critical eye and say they should or shouldn't do this or that. However, if we remember that they are doing the best they can, then there is seldom any room in our mind for criticism. Instead of criticism we can offer acceptance and understanding, (and forgiveness, if necessary) and we can replace expectations with … [Read more...]

BE YOU Bravely and celebrate ‘who’ you are!

Most people can spot a phony a mile away. I've been running into quite a few people lately who seem to be trying to be something or someone they are not. Every time we make small choices to fit in, we are burying a little part of ourselves down deep. Which got me thinking... When you learn to be yourself, you learn to trust yourself. You will begin to listen to the "voice" within. As you acknowledge this inner-connection, and begin to listen to it, your life will begin to be different in … [Read more...]

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